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  • Roxy SZN

Snowman and I

Updated: Dec 31, 2021


I’ve been hearing songs about snowman for a long time. This holiday season, however, hearing Frosty the Snowman, triggered an awareness, to help me close a 26-year-old wound, once and for all. The lyric to the song claims that Frosty was a jolly happy soul (like me), with a corn cob pipe and a button nose (no button, banana in my case…lol) and two eyes made from coal. Apparently, he magically came to life and began to dance around (like me). One day the sun came out and he melted away, but before melting, he waved and said don’t cry, I’ll be back some day.


This was yet another unusual Christmas for us. With my youngest infected with the new covid variant (Omicron), we were home bound. Like last year, we did not have any parties. My kid’s traditional “Cousins Bake Off” was cancelled. In case you are wondering, “Cousins Bake-off” is a tradition I started and is the day where my kids and their cousins, bring ingredients to make their favorite sweet or food at our place and we all eat and enjoy, while making a big mess in our kitchen.


Holidays of any kind meant tones of fun and happy memories for me. As a child, we celebrated the Persian new year with so much zest and veracity. My parents continued the traditions after we migrated to the States. They even added our host country’s holidays, like Christmas, Thanksgiving, 4th of July, and few others. As a single adult, I added other religious and national holidays to my list of celebrations, like Hanukkah, Diwali, etc.


After marriage, things changed. Holidays were not as frivolous as before. This was mostly because the family I married into, was not so keen on holidays. I think their culture of holiday indifference stemmed from losses (family members) around the holidays. I can’t imagine, the hurt such days can trigger. This lack of interest in the holiday celebrations, was more confusing and frustrating for the first few years of marriage. As a mother, I felt the need to pass on all the happy memories I had experienced during these festive times of the year. So, I had to overcompensate to ensure the boys have the same happy childhood memories as their peers and myself. Carrying this torch alone, I must confess, has been a source of heartache and disappointment for the past 26 years.


Then came the Frosty the Snowman song. The song netted my attention all day, about two weeks before Christmas. I could not stop whistling and singing it that day. Funny, how I have listened and danced to it for forty some years, and finally got the symbolism. You see…Snowman stays intact in cold and frigid climates. It even becomes rigid and can’t be altered in lower temperatures. As temperatures rise, the snowman loses itself, it melts away and becomes one with the earth. If you think of temperature as level of awareness, the lower one’s awareness, the more rigid and dogmatic they are, as their awareness rises, the more flexible and fluidic they become, to the point where they become one with their source. The snowman metaphorically is the story of human involution or the journey within.


How does this song relate to my exasperated holidays, you may ask? Well, you see, throughout the years, I had to look forward to something. After New Year’s Eve, I had Valentine’s Day to think about, then the Persian New Year, graduation season, then fourth of July, start of school year, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Yelda (or Winter solstice, celebrated by Persians as the longest night of the year and marks the birth of Mitra the god of light) then Christmas, then the cycle started over again. Every quarter, every season, something to hope for. Perhaps, this was my way of avoiding the Now.


The truth is, for the past 26 years, like Frosty, I have been melting slowly. I have and still am learning that everyday is a holiday. Every day has its own reason to celebrate. This last sentence may come across as another cliche, we all read on social media venues. But trust me folks, it's true.


For those of you who have reached high temperatures and are almost there, (level of awareness) you probably are thinking "how cute, by George, she’s got it!" and those of you who still live in the tundras, I promise, melting is not as sad as it sounds. Becoming one with your source slowly, is pure bliss and please trust when Frosty says: don’t you cry, as he (joy) will be back one day I am sure he is referring to a state of being where he is no longer is impacted by temperature.


Grateful as always, and may your days be merry and peaceful…


AMBKJ


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