I am back from my winter getaway and ready to work hard and make an impact. I spent the past six weeks with a friend who I like to call "The Delta Lady" and will be writing more about her soon.
Towards the end of December, I had reached a point where I was not operating at my optimum. Robert Greenleaf, in his book: Servant as Leader, suggests that we need to become aware of our capacity. He asserts that when we reach our threshold, we should bow out and take time off to regroup. In an earlier note, (Indolence) I mentioned my burnout, so no need to go into more details at this point. But bowing out and regrouping (in addition to keeping my friend company) was exactly the purpose of this long escape.
I want to share an insight that I've gained from this trip. (Beside realizing how much I love eating clean snow with Agave syrup, lime juice and rose water) My biggest takeaway from this trip was understanding my priorities. In the past, I have made others my priority. My belief stems from a famous quote by M.S. Irani: "Real happiness lies in making others happy". In the process of making others happy, I found that I have neglected myself (my health), my home, and some of my boys’ needs. Ironically, I have been quite happy doing just that…
The truth is we all want perfection in the home front; and when we don’t have that perfect picture, we tend to gear towards other areas we think we can reach perfection. Some of us even develop grand ideas, like ending world hunger or illuminating anyone we meet (mostly because it is unattainable, but in our head, we think we are doing something important). There are those who hide behind their work, religion, alcohol, drugs or even extreme hobbies to avoid facing their imperfect homes. Well, this time away has made me realize, I have so much to do for my home front, for my health, home improvement projects, and of course for my immediate family. May be the Persian/Islamic proverb applies here: “The light that can be used in your home is proscribed if used at the mosque.”
I have always been an advocate for working inside out, meaning, to fix the mess inside and then letting it shine and radiate out. I have worked hard throughout the years to fix my inside by reading spiritual and self-help books, completed years of therapy to overcome my adjustment issues as an immigrant teen, and I have willingly listened to honest criticism, and tried to fix as many of my flaws as possible. I still do and have a long way to go…My inside however, during Covid, squeezed all it had and radiated it out quite far. It’s time for my closer surroundings to get some light. I am not sure what the next chapter of my life would be, but it will for sure include a delightful and happy place for you all to visit one day.
AMBKJ
